FEMA Falsehoods

 

Let’s file this one under asinine, witless and/or preposterous. Scarily myopic works too.

 

FEMA, the same federal agency justifiably slammed by media, Congress and the government for its handling of the Hurricane Katrina disaster somehow reached the implausible conclusion that it was time to organize a fake event with FEMA employees posing as phony reporters.

 

After giving real reporters only 15 minutes to show up, they decided to address the issue of FEMA’s response to the Southern California wildfires. The press room was filled with the agency’s own public affairs personnel who proceeded to ask their own questions and rate their own behavior.

 

The verdict? “I’m very happy with FEMA’s response so far,” says Deputy Administrator Harvey Johnson who MC’d the event.

  

News blogs broke the news that everything was staged and FEMA scrambled for cover once again. Michael Chertoff was plenty irritated over the weekend. I liked the part about him making it clear in “Anglo-Saxon prose” that this kind of behavior better not be seen again.

 

Am I getting hopelessly old or do you actually have to warn people not to do this kind of thing these days?

 

As communications professionals, lots of us have organized press conferences. Can you imagine orchestrating a press event designed specifically to keep reporters away? 

 

Let’s imagine how the thought process might have played out:

 

FEMA head PA honcho: Good morning, we’re here to talk about creative public affairs. Remember the time our agency was publicly slammed because it didn’t respond the correct way to that big hurricane disaster?

 

FEMA PA staff: What was the name of that one again?

 

FEMA head PA honcho: Katrina. It was Katrina.

 

FEMA PA staff: Gotcha.

 

FEMA head PA honcho: Okay, this time we’re going to get our hands around the Southern California wildfires and manage things the way they’re supposed to be managed. What I have in mind is a creative news conference.

 

FEMA PA staff: What do you mean by “creative?”

 

FEMA head PA honcho: Glad you asked that question. It’s a press conference where WE get to ask ALL the hard questions.

 

FEMA PA staff: A very cool idea. But how do we do that if reporters are in the room?

 

FEMA head PA honcho: Here’s the brilliant part. We give the real reporters only 15 minutes to show up. They can’t possibly make it that quick; everyone’s so busy these days. Knowing this, we fill the room with you guys and then YOU get to ask all the tough questions about how we’re doing with these wildfires.

 

FEMA PA staff: Wow! This will enable us to actually use our advance Q&A document for once!

 

After blogs and newspapers strafed FEMA, they finally released an apology of sorts. Laura Keehner of the agency said “We have made it clear stunts such as this will not be tolerated or repeated.”

 

Okay communications professionals, let’s recap the big lesson learned here so everything is crystal clear going forward for all of us. Please remember that it will always be unethical to stage a press conference where your own staff poses as reporters and the event is passed off as legitimate news. Don’t do this, ever.

 

 I feel much better.